My people, it's time for a Cubs vs. Cards series, which means it's long past time for me to return to the world of blogs. Plus with Tony LaRussa planning to use Chris Carpenter as a closer, I need to make my return.

So let's get down to it. Big Tony says he's going to use Carpenter as his closer whenever he can. This is one of the dumber ideas I've heard, and here's why. It's time to find out what you've got in the bullpen. I understand Chris Perez has struggled a smidge, but that doesn't mean you take the job away from him. He blew a save in two of his last three appearances. Let's be honest, who hasn't blown a save out of the pen this season? Tony should anoint Perez the closer and let him finish the season in that spot. Carpenter's future isn't as a closer. What is Big Tony hoping to gain? It seems like a waste to me.

Reserved Parking

Don't think I've forgotten about this little nugget. I'm giving it to Jim Haslett today because he won't be around much longer. He might as well get to park up front one last time, especially after his defense coughed up 38 points to the Eagles on Sunday. YIKES! It's been nice knowing you, Jimmy.

Ludwick-O-Meter

For those of you who have been around for a while, you know we created the buzz about Ludwick last season. We charted his successes and cheered him on while he struggled. It's there for all to see: We made Ryan Ludwick try harder. So I take some time away from the blog and what happens? My boy becomes an All-Star. Ahh, we're proud of you Ry-Guy. Now keep it up because the Ludwick-O-Meter is rising faster than the Mississippi in March.

Are you ready for some football?

Apparently the answer is no if you're the St. Louis Rams. Momma-sita, that was horrible Sunday. What were they doing? Not moving the ball, silly. Not stopping anyone, goofy-von-gooferton. Man, if this is the type of season we're in for, the Rams better prepare for the No. 1 overall pick. Ugly isn't a strong enough word. Maybe pitiful. Or horrendous. Or shameful. Or fire-Linehan-tastic. Yeah, I like the last one.